Bloggystyle -- The Greatest

In the United States, people riot in response to white guys beating the everloving shit out of black guys.

In Great Britain, people riot because they are too eager to get a goddam sofa.

Dozens of officers were backed up by fire engines and ambulances as tempers raged in Edmonton, North London. One woman lost consciousness and many more were injured.

Thousands turned up to grab special offers, like a sofa for £45.

As the Swedish-owned store flung open its doors at midnight the crowd surged in. Terrified staff had to bolt the doors again after just half an hour.

Sadly, some people were unable to get that prized davenport that would accentuate the living room. Those individuals got up their Watts style mentality.

Customers, many who had queued for 13 hours, were furious at missing the giveaway. Some tried to smash doors open.

Others tried in vain to escape the crush. Those inside battled over furniture.

Kirk Rutter, 33, from Dagenham, Essex, said: "It was a stampede. They were like animals. I saw women punching women and men threatening children."

Now before I continue to bash the Brits, this article poignantly points out that a similar situation happened when the same store opened in Saudi Arabia. But I think that may have been due to women running into each other because they were blinded by their veils.


Wearing that thing makes plenty of sense, if you ever wonder what it's like to be Helen Keller.


"I hear there's a special on couches at IKEA. Henri Paul, get me over there as fast as possible!"